Why Quitting Shouldn’t be seen as Failure.

Hello Readers,

Today I want to address the topic of quitting. Whether it’s a job, a sport or a bad habit, quitting can be hard. Quitting is often put in the same category as failure, it is compared to “giving up”, but quitting is not always a bad thing. There is two types of quitting; there is “it’s too hard and I don’t want to try.” (this is the bad form of quitting) and there is “it’s no longer improving my life and there is something better out there.” It’s important to learn the difference between these two forms of quitting before you judge someone for quitting.

Recently, I made a huge decision to quit something that has been apart of my life for almost 9 years and made me the person I am today. That is: Cheerleading. I started cheerleading in middle school and continued into high school. Cheerleading was and has been a huge part of my life. I tried out for my college team in the end of my senior year of high school and that continued my journey with the sport to college. Cheering in college was one of my greatest experiences, I was able to meet so many new people and I even got to cheer at a national competition in Daytona Beach, Florida. It was a dream come true!

But, as my second year with the program began this past summer, things began to change. The team had new members, the cliques began to form and I was feeling indifferent about the whole thing. I found myself constantly down on myself and my teammates. I am not one to gossip but I found myself doing it more and more as the year progressed. I also have never felt as negative about my body as I did this past season. Slowly things began to add up to the point that I would cry after practice and stress out constantly. This is not who I am nor is it who I want to be. This was supposed to be my stress reliever, why was it the main cause for my stress?

One day after a hard practice, I was talking to one of my coaches and I lost it. I told him that cheerleading wasn’t the same for me this year. When I started cheer I loved the challenge in learning new skills and I loved the team aspect. This past season though, it felt different. The people were different, I did not have the drive I once had and I think that was partially from the disconnected team and coaches. I found myself surrounded with people I no longer felt like being around. The sport also costed me a lot of money, and coming from a single parent home I don’t have much to throw around. So, I had to make a rather tough decision and came to the conclusion to quit. Although the decision was very hard because I still loved the sport, it wasn’t hard to see in the end it would be better for my health and my bank account. I also am traveling to France this summer on a study abroad program and saving my money is crucial to me going.

But, out of this story I want to highlight the point of quitting and failure. I was often held back by this idea that quitting meant failure, and I was not a quitter. Hell, I have a tattoo that says never give up, how could I quit!?

Well, I am here to tell you all quitting is not failure if what you are quitting is no longer a positive influence in your life. That may seem too simple but that is the ultimate deciding factor. Before I quit, I reached out to many people and this was one of the things someone told me-and it stuck! There are many other reasons to quit but think about it like this: your life is a book (cheesy, I know but trust me!) and if you never quit anything and just stayed on one page, would you ever grow or be presented with new opportunities? Probably not. Since I have been cheering for so long, I feel like I was always defined by cheerleading because it was what I did, but that’s the key. It was an activity, not who I am. What you do is not who you are and you shouldn’t let that stop you. If you studied for three years to be a nurse but you figure out being a photographer is what really sparks the fire in your soul, do that! Just because you did something doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it. Live your life for yourself.

If you are working at a okay job and making okay money, that’s fine but if you were presented with a better job with better pay, you should take it. It is a better opportunity that will positively impact you, why would you stay at job you are not growing in.

So, as you can see quitting isn’t always bad. Now if you are just starting a new sport or a new job and it’s hard and you don’t think you like it, don’t quit. Give it a chance. Quitting something is only okay when your health or happiness is being jeopardized. Life is too short, everything you do should be impacting your life in a positive way, or at least bringing you some sort of happiness while doing it. And if it is not, maybe you should begin to evaluate where you want to be and where you are now, and really think is this what I want. When you do decide to quit something you need to think about it in a way that you are making room for something new and better, you know the old sane “close one door open another.”

Disclaimer: I do have a tattoo that says “never give up” and I want to explain that never give up is a general statement that I follow. It means never give up on your dreams or goals, never give up on life and never give up on love. Life is not always going to be easy and although giving up may seem like the way out, it’s not. Work hard for the things you want and they will come. Never give up. This doesn’t mean never quit anything even if you are unhappy. It just means work hard for your dreams everyday until they are achieved. Example: I wanted to cheer in college and compete in Daytona Beach on the band shell-and I did just that. Now there is more to life and I am going to find it.

Please excuse me while I be basic, but this really is a “new year, new me” scenario. I haven’t not cheered since 2008 and this year will be very different for me. I cannot wait to explore myself beyond cheer. Since making the decision to quit, I have learned that life is short and everything you do needs to be important to you. Be kind to the people around you and spread love, but before you can do that you need to love yourself. You need to invest in yourself. If you are making decisions based on what other people are telling you, then you are doing it all wrong. This is your life and you need to live it the way you want.

Thank you for reading tonight, this post is really big for me because it is my first public debut since I quit. I figured my beloved readers should be the first to know. (publicly that is!) I hope this post can also act as guide for you if you find yourself struggling with the decision to quit. If you do find yourself in this predicament feel free to contact me via email, I would be happy to give advice. Email: alyssawaid13@outlook.com

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Wishing you the best in 2016,

Lyss